|
Post by FISSION MAILED on Jun 24, 2006 12:06:07 GMT -5
Partly inspired by various threads on the Barbelith site and, well, some recent developments in my personal life, I pose the question: Why is the love for another deemed to be the greatest narrative/ideology/belief/fulfillment in our existence. Noone is truly compatible with one another. You can only create a compatibility between you and the other, which in the final anaylise is just a lived out narrative of an ideal thats been shoved in your face since birth by family, society and the media. Investing alot in somebody else can be a huge mistake. It is a big mistake. I'm going to really regret posting this but I just want to disassemble all this time wasting flotsam in my head by hearing whatever anybody else has to say on the matter. If I may be so bold to profane, but this shit is dehydrating my mind, body and soul. They say its ideal to talk to strangers about stuff...
|
|
|
Post by jayvee on Jun 24, 2006 21:25:18 GMT -5
That's easy.
It's always best to see a movie with someone you can talk to about it with afterwards.
There's also that whole primal instinct must have sex thing.
So you mix the two, let it sit for awhile and PRESTO!
Relationships.
|
|
|
Post by FISSION MAILED on Jun 25, 2006 4:53:44 GMT -5
I just want to become a different person with different memories in a different house to live in. I'm going through sheer self-loathing at the moment. The mind can get so fixated on the smallest things...
Sorry. This has nothing whatsoever to do with comics. Its turning into a big sulk when more than anyhting else I just want to move on. Quoting from someone else, it feels like I've been abducted by some ufo and I cant remeber anytrhing that took place for the duration of the capture.
|
|
|
Post by jayvee on Jun 25, 2006 11:48:39 GMT -5
At least you can take comfort in the knowledge that you're not the only one it's happened to.
Fate hates everyone else, as well, and they seem to keep it together so you can hope that you can, too.
|
|
|
Post by FISSION MAILED on Jun 26, 2006 4:38:29 GMT -5
Thanks for the reply. Gotta keep my head above water.
|
|
|
Post by nolan on Jun 26, 2006 9:58:59 GMT -5
I'm not even sure monogamy is a relevant concept at all anymore.
It all ties in to the main reson why marriage was important: ensuring legitimate male offspring to pass property on to.
Love only entered in to it MUCH later as a justification for such a ridiculous and sexist system.
|
|
|
Post by FISSION MAILED on Jun 26, 2006 13:58:47 GMT -5
But we kind of need monagomy to place focus in a single direction, it helps to prioritise our attentions. It might be a strain for some but its a good ideal to live up to.Knowing and having a partner thats there for you, that always looks out for you. That dependance on eachother, that can make you feel a strength that you can't seem to get from anywhere else.
|
|
|
Post by jayvee on Jun 26, 2006 23:14:49 GMT -5
Human children take much longer to develop than the offspring of other species and Nature has insured two people stay together long enough to make sure those children live. It's why we have emotions like jealousy and the accompanying hierarchy of feelings. Monogamy is built into our systems. It's hard-wired into the brain, part of our natural biology.
Marriage, despite all the hooks religion's put in it, has always been about peace of mind, that the relationship was defined as lasting a lifetime so people didn't struggle with insecurities or doubt. They KNEW--kind of like what Fission was saying. Pagans did it long before the Christians even thought about it.
|
|
|
Post by nolan on Jun 27, 2006 12:47:30 GMT -5
No it isn't. Not at all.
And marriage was never really about being together for life. There have ALWAYS been loopholes that allow divorce (and that is without getting in to concubines and mistresses). IN Mesopotamia, there were divorces. There were grounds one could get an "annulment" in the Christian tradition (which were, honestly, about the same as a divorce more often then not).
|
|
|
Post by jayvee on Jun 27, 2006 16:55:59 GMT -5
There are loopholes in the legal system that get people out of jail, too, but that doesn't mean the legal system was never intended to put people in jail in the first place. In all things there's an escape clause. Having one doesn't defeat it's purpose because there always has to be a way to correct mistakes (even if you don't foresee any happening).
|
|
|
Post by nolan on Jun 27, 2006 20:53:08 GMT -5
There are loopholes in the legal system that get people out of jail, too, but that doesn't mean the legal system was never intended to put people in jail in the first place. In all things there's an escape clause. Having one doesn't defeat it's purpose because there always has to be a way to correct mistakes (even if you don't foresee any happening). And yet with all those loopholes, so many innocent people go to jail.
|
|
|
Post by jayvee on Jun 27, 2006 22:32:56 GMT -5
Doesn't take away from its intended function... Further proving my point!
|
|
|
Post by dragonaces on Jul 5, 2006 12:29:15 GMT -5
Today, being married can mean several things:
1. Your spouse is wealthy and you want some of it 2. You want to make the ultimate sacrifice to prove your love for someone and devote your life to them 3. You were drunk and in Las Vegas 4. You knocked up or got knocked up and are being pressured by your family to "do what's right"
There is no rule that states a person needs to get married. If you love someone be with them, if you don't...leave. If you want children take responsibility. If you want sex, let people know ahead of time so they understand what it's about. Making bad decisions is all about not being honest with yourself and the people around you concerning what it is that you want. If you know someone (same sex or opposite) be true to your feelings and theirs and the best thing that can happen...will happen.
|
|
|
Post by FISSION MAILED on Jul 6, 2006 14:53:22 GMT -5
I think the human race would benefit greatly from some kind of evolvement into some self-sufficient state of being.
|
|
|
Post by jayvee on Jul 8, 2006 8:41:19 GMT -5
Then we'd lose our reliance on one another. Our greater support structure has allowed us to become what we are because there's a larger web or resources to work with that other species don't have. Other species, they interact with maybe a hundred others of their kind... Human beings, we do it with hundreds of thousands and a lot of that is seeded in sexuality, IMO.
|
|